Ghetto Dreamin’

I grew up less fortunate than most of the people I associate with now. And yet, there were many people I grew up with worse off than me. The struggle was real. I won’t bore you with all the details as some of you that know me, just know… It is what it is. Or rather, was.

I vividly remember my mom working multiple jobs just to make ends meet. She would get up earlier than most for work and then come home later than most from work, and we’d eat and then sometimes go help clean a building at night after… She later worked her tail off towards first, her Bachelor’s and then her Master’s degree and made a better life for herself. She’ll always be my hero for that and so many other things.

She and many others’ determination, investments, and belief in a better life for not only their life but also for my life, have and continue to change my world.

Another of my younger life’s defining moments was the night I spent with June. She was my ‘grandma for a day’. She was an older lady and I was all of 11. We went out and got my hair done and we went shopping and bought me a new dress and got ice cream. It was a delightful day.

I’ll never forget trying on that dress. I felt something I really hadn’t before. In that moment with my hair all dolled up professionally for the first time, in this semi-frilly fuscha dress, oddly enough, I felt… free… And I now understand what it was that in that moment has stayed with me throughout my life…

In that moment, looking at myself in the mirror, I knew I was made for more than my current circumstances. I felt in my bones, ‘This is me. This is what I want for my life.’ I knew in that moment I was worth more than my circumstances dictated.

It wasn’t about money or status. It was about the struggle; the struggle to have a fuller life… A fuller life AMIDST the struggle. A life that reflects who you truly are. A life you don’t hide in shame from. A life with real family and faithful friends. A life flowing with milk and honey…

Life has been far from a fairy tale, yet I do not begrudge it. I don’t begrudge my less than childhood, or my teenage years of way too much gang B.S. I don’t begrudge death or divorce or even more death. I’ve honored the struggle. My circumstances and my latter choices formed me into who I am today. And as you know, I now like me.

I’m livin’ a ghetto dream… And I wouldn’t change it all for the world.

I’ll always remember moments like those in the dressing room and seeing my mother strive for a better life… The moments that gave me hope for more. The moments that gave me a vision of a better life. The moments that stirred me to also strive to bring those visions into a lifelong reality. I clung to a dream of more and it has served me well.

I must say, I couldn’t and wouldn’t have done it without my Jesus. I have been so blessed having him in my world. I don’t think eternity is enough time to thank him for all he has done and been for me. Not only being my Savior in many more ways than just his ultimate sacrifice for me, but also for bringing into my life those who lead and encourage me to live a life that only dreams are made of…

I know where I come from. And I know how few and far between it is that people like me then, have blossomed into those who have overcome now. I learned the beauty of being in lack and in plenty. I learned the beauty of every sorrow and every joy. I know now without a doubt that I AM worth more than any circumstance can ever try to dictate.

If you are there, in the ghetto of life, dreaming… I want you to know that you too are made for more. And regardless of what life has thrust upon you, you can HAVE more.

How?! His name is Jesus. And he is patiently waiting for the day you simply accept the gift of the abundant life he has already prepared for you before the world was ever even formed. A beautiful life regardless of your income or lack thereof. A joyous life of never being alone in your heartache. A glorious life knowing you have a forever home, built in heaven, just for you.

Give him a chance. What do you have to lose?!