Real Realities

I’m a mess… It’s true. I am almost 42 years old. I’ve been divorced twice. I live in an apartment. I drink too often. I’m no longer physically fit. Health issues still lurk…. By some standards, I’m a mess.

But I’m not.

For the first time in my life, I allowed myself to stay single. I learned again who I am, and I’m still learning. But I was given the gift of alone time, to find who I am and who I want to eventually be for someone. I’m not a failure, I just got it wrong twice.

Yes, I live all alone in an apartment. And I love it! I love that I was privileged to give a gift few could or ever would.

I drink wine. Often. I have a deep appreciation for a good bottle of merlot. I’m not a saint. And to pretend I am would mean denying myself something I thoroughly enjoy and I’m not about that. All good things in moderation though, right?! Except when they aren’t, but we won’t go there.

Working out and health issues… You’re not there and I’m not there so let’s just not go there either…

The reality is that I have messed up and have some messed up things in my life, yes. But I am not a mess. I am a work in progress. A true testament that life goes on. That though the sufferings of this world may be great, the things yet to come are far greater.

This life I live is real. And this life is an abundant life. The truth of what it is, is my reality. So despite all that’s not ‘right’, I know I am blessed.

This is my real reality. And I thankfully get to live it.